I love IC3!

Haha, but not really. I passed my first test, though! Which is such a relief. My average in my class in now a 33 or something. Which sucks, but still. I'm getting there. Studying on test 2. Wish me luck.

FUCK IC3

In my first period, my teacher thought it would be a cool idea to base our last fucking nine weeks on three big tests, that ARE NOT easy to pass at ALL. & I think we get like 2 tries on each. & I tried the first test once, which I failed. We take practice tests, & it just depends on what my grades are. Sometimes they're good, sometimes they're bad. So, I have no average right now, unless I pass something. Which is fucking stupid. If I fail all these tests, I don't have a grade which is a fucking 0. Which pretty much makes me get a C for the whole semester. Me, working my ass off everyday to fucking get good grades, & it doesn't matter at all. Awesome.
Fuck this.

Wooooowowowowwoowooo

My weekend was alright.
Friday, I hung out with Britni, Emma, & Jacob. After school, Emma & I got some delicious ice cream & talked about weird stuff, I forgot. We went to Britni's, talked to her mom about some more weird stuff. We went to my house, hung out with Jacob & the puppies. We went to Brian's birthday party, which was fun for a little while, but it was outside, so I cried & ran away from stupid bees. I know they won't sting me, they're still annoying. We were gonna play some laser tag afterward, but it started thunder storming, & no one felt like going anymore. So we stayed in my basement, watching movies till midnight. Emma & Britni fell asleep on the couch, so I went in the guest room & slept by myself ):
Saturday, we woke up, ate cereal, (which is seriously all we do at my house, haha). We went to Belk in Lenoir, because there was a little fundraiser thing for our school, so we went to help out. But we didn't need to, so we walked around. I got new underwear & a bra, which can also be strapless for my prom dress :D I went home, & did like, nothing else. Slept & watched TV & stuff. That's basically it.
Sunday, I woke up feeling like shit. My glands felt really swollen, & my throat was really dry, as much as I tried drinking a lot of liquids. We laid around, which is what my family does Sundays anymore. We were supposed to clean the garage as an 'activity', but no one really felt like it. I went to Wal-Mart with my little brother, where I met Jacob, did shopping, & went home. My dad is always a fucking dick. ALWAYS. So, I got into arguments with him, as usual, & I'm still mad at him, he's always so fucking rude & fucking inconsiderate of other people's feelings. & I'm hardly talking to him. I don't think he understands the concept of 'give respect & you'll get respect'. So fuck him. Jacob & I made sandwiches, & went on a picnic, in my back yard, when the sun was setting, because it was disgustingly hot allll Saturday! It was nice. Then we laid out there for a while, till Fernando ruined it, & went out there. Then it was more ruined, because my dad went out there, for NO REASON, & turned on the porch lights, which fucked up our star gazing.


Basically, I fail at doing everything, & when I do, please feel free to yell at me & call me all sorts of names. Thank you.

Runt of the litter

Yeah, well, he died. Jacob announced him dead when we were petting the puppies with out index fingers. He was very weak, & it seemed as if he wasn't eating at all. Jacob & I tried feeding him a few times with a little baby bottle we bought at Petsmart, but he just wasn't eating. At least we tried. We buried him in my back yard right in front of one of the trees. Maybe he'll help the tree grow<3

I have 8 new puppies.

Molly, popped them out yesterday morning. They're adorable. She's a chow mix Australian Shepard or some shit, & the father is a chocolate lab. Or there could be a few fathers. Who knows. But here they are! :D

They're freeeee, in a couple of months. If anyone's interested<3

Blowing Rock, North Carolina

is one of the cutest places I've ever been to. I really do love the mountains. & no, Jacob, I don't hate all of North Carolina :p

I love the view. & it's really just a cute place to shop, eat ice cream, play at the park & eat a nice restaurant with a nice view. Even though ears pop a lot ):

These are all taken on my phone, so they kinda suck. I'm uploading the better camera quality ones on my myspace (:

& this is us shopping! :D

A good day (:

Spring breakage

I haven't blogged all week, or so. Lets go over interesting shit that went down:

Monday: I went to the eye doctor, & that bastard kept poking my eyes & making them water. Then I took my grandma to therapy for her bad hips. Good deed of the day!

Tuesday: I went to Britni's house for a while, to dye eggs & make brownies with the girlssss. We then went to the movies to see Hannah Montana. IT WAS SO GREAT. Not gonna lie.

Wednesday: I hung out with Jacob. He mowed my lawn like all day, so we didn't get to spend that much time together. We were gonna go to church, but went to the mall instead.

Thursday: I hung out with Jacob again. I drove my mom to work really early to keep the car. Jacob came over to finish mowing. I took my grandma to the salon so she could get her hair did. Jacob & I went to Charlotte to pick up my cousins from the bus station. They're visiting. Fernando had a little birthday party to go to at Hickory Dickory Dock, where we later discovered had free laser tag after 9, like all the time. Awesome. My first time playing laser tag, & I was the only girl on the team. It was really fun. We won.

Friday (late tonight): I woke up in the afternoon. I went to breakfast with my grandma, Fernando, & my cousin around 1. Jacob came over after & we hung out for a little bit, before we went to Hickory. We promised Fernando we'd take him to Monsters vs. Aliens & then play laser tag at HDD. So we did. The movie was really, really good, in fact the best 3-D movie I've ever seen. It made me laugh a lot. HDD was super packed. Turns out not only do they have free laser tag after 9, but on Fridays, they give you free pizza & drinks. It was fun, but not so much cause we had to wait in line forever. Jacob's adorable step brother, Stephen, came & hung out with us. It was nice. & we fucking won both times we played. I guess the thanks goes to us ;] I came home late, at about 12:30, which is the latest I've ever been out with Jacob, only to find people karaoke-ing downstairs.
I'm really tired, but I can't get to sleep with so much noise. Therefore I'm blogging, mobile! I'm so glad I finally got internet on my phone.

Good night!

Dear Blogger,

I didn't know who else to turn to. I hate the phone & my dogs can't talk. Jacob just left, after spending a great afternoon with me on this pretty Easter Sunday. But right before he left, he said 'are you sure you're not losing any feelings for me?' I don't know why in the world he would ask me that. I think anyone with eyes can see we're two love birds. I can never get tired of you, Jacob. Ever. I don't think I could ever lose feelings for you, unless you did something horrible to me, like kill my family/pets or cheat on me or some shit like that. I love you. I simply don't WANT that to change. (I didn't want to sound cliché & say 'that'll never change', because I honestly don't know that). We could never do anything sexual for the rest of our lives, & I bet I'd be happier than a mouse with a lifetime supply of cheese. I don't care whether we do anything or everything. That to me, doesn't decide or measure how much you mean to me. Nor how 'passionate' one is to another. I'm sorry I don't know how to express myself to you correctly, but we'll get there. Its worth the wait, however long it may be<3 I couldn't imagine being happy one bit, if I'm not with you. I mean it. You're perfect to me. So don't you dare ask me 'what you can do better'. I'm with you, because of who you are, not what you can do or be. I'm very pleased with you. I'm not someone who keeps much to herself. I'll tell you if something's bothering me. It made me feel bad when you asked me that tonight. Silly tears ran down my face as I hugged you. I don't ever want you to doubt me, or yourself again. Like I said, you're perfect. I try my best to be a good person, keep you happy, as well as myself happy. Believe me, I'm keeping you for as long as I can<3

I feel disgusted

I feel disgusted with myself.
With everyone I know/used to know.
With everything they do or say.
I'm disgusted with people trying to be something they're not.
Disgusted with how they choose to portray themselves.
I'm disgusted with how I used to be, how I used to act,
how I used to talk, how I used to think.
I'm sick of not making sense.
Not even in my own head do I make sense.


Fuck Renata.
Fuck you.
Fuck everything.

I wish people took some pride in themselves once in a while.
I wish everyone wasn't so worthless in my eyes. In your eyes.


I'm insane, basically.
I babble on about nothing.
Not only do I babble in my head, I have to do it on Blogger.

I apologize.

Soon to be deleted.

Aggression

I don't know why I feel so aggressive. I just WANT some bitch to get in my face & me just destroy her. & with so much anger, I bet I could. I bet I could.

MINE

This is MY idea, for one of my first tattoos. I've been thinking forever, & I don't want something that everyone think is so simple, or already has, or even has though of. I want it to be meaningful, & I want it to be original. & I finally thought of something. I was looking at feet tattoos yesterday, & I was like 'that is so cute! I want one.' Then they were nice designs & others had words. But then, it hit me. 'The Creation of Adam.' I fell in love with that painting in the 8th grade. So, I was either thinking of getting it on just one foot, maybe even the rest of the bodies, or maybe just a hand on each foot. & the space between the fingers would be at the curve of my feet, when I put them together. I believe in God, it could mean that. But it could also mean epic fail. That God never touched Adam, therefore there never was. However you think or view it, it's symbolical. & it's my idea. My very own. I'm proud. I want it. I cannot wait. Even though it'll hurt like a bitch, I'm ready. But before this, I want a smaller tattoo, somewhere else. I was thinking of the inside of a peace sign somewhere. I really want one on my earlobe. Then I was thinking of a cute little sail boat with stars somewhere. & definitely the outline of the country Peru somewhere, maybe on my upper back. Because I'm fully Peruvian, obv. Moo moo.


& then I just thought! The Creation of Adam tatt can also be on my chest. But then it'd look kinda creepy if I wore a tank or something, & you just saw fingers or something. I dunno. Then I'll get something simple on my feet. But then I was thinking of getting a heart rate/pulse thingy on the left side of my chest. hmmm! who knows.

Andrea is a paint master

Just so everyone knows.

She turned this:

& this:
into this!

INSANE. I look like a giant freak & Jacob looks like a tiny forest elf. Hahahaha. Weirdo with a beard-o ;] Courtesy to Evan Almighty. I painted his face at the rodeo I mentioned in the blog before, btw. He's not that weird, to just randomly walk around the mall like that.

Weekend!

Friday, I hung out with Andrea & Emma. We went down town Hickory & saw Bride Wars! Because that's them, haha. It was really cute, too. Met up with Jacob & his friend Brandon afterwards, & went to IHOP with my parents. Ate some pancakes, & the whole time, it was hysterical. We went into Barnes & Nobles for like, 10 minutes, because they were closing soon. I ran into my used-to-be- bff, Santana. It was nice. I really miss her a lot. They slept over, & we fell asleep on the couch, watching Semi-Pro.

We woke up, I showered, got ready, & went back downstairs to wake the others. Ate cereal, & watched One Missed Call. Stupid, but there was nothing else on, so whatever. Jacob came over, & we left with err'body to the rodeo! Hahah, my first one. It was kinda lame though. I painted a million faces though! I volunteered, & made 4 year old's dreams come true of having a cute ice cream cone painted on their face. Everyone seemed to get sunburned but me ;]

^^^ I painted Jacob's beard-o, & Andi did the Twin Towers, roflll.

& JACOB GOT SUNBURNED AROUUUUND HIS FAKE BEARD, hahahah.

We then went back home, just Jacob & I, & got his car & went to Hickory. We met his mom at Fashion Mart near the mall, where I got my dress. We ordered his vest, because they had the color, but they only made it for little boys, haha! I bought a cute handbag to go with my dress. I was thinking about getting shoes, but since by gooold dress has a silver button, I can wear either gold or silver shoes, & I already have silver shoes. But I'll have to see. & about the jewelery, as well. We then went to the mall. We ate Subway, mmm. Then walked around, went into Charlotte Russe. I bought the cutest dress in the world. & this nice shirt I'm wearing now. Walked around some more, & ran into Lauren & her group of buddies (: It was good seeing her. We ran off like little girls & went into Claire's & took pictures. Then we left, to meet my parents in Longview at a football field to egg hunt. But we got there late, so we played on the swings & slide, forever, until some guy caught in mid-kiss & told us he had to lock the gate. Basically, gtfo! I was extremely embarrassed. I think that if I was with any random boy, I wouldn't care. But since it's a special boy, I was embarrassed because I think it's something private. I dunno, I'm dumb. We met my parents at Barnes & Nobles, got some coffee & the best double chocolate cupcake, EVA! We talked a bunch about philosophy, & I respect that you want to be a lunatic philosophy professor, Jacob (:

Sunday, I honestly did nothing. I sat in bed, in my pajamas forever, watching endless movies on HBO. I got up for like, 20 minutes to go with my mom & grandma to get her perscriptions at CVS & then some $1 sundaes at McDonald's. That's it.

Well, now I'm dumb

Because according to Jacob's myspace status & last blog, he's acting weird & as if something's wrong & bothering him. & I dunno if it's me, or something. Although I don't remember doing anything. I dunno. I'm dumb. I just wish I knew what it was so I can try to fix it.

Whatevs :l

My kissy face is so funny

Accodring to Emma.
I was TRYING to moomoo.
But she says I was trying to kiss her.
Jacob will frown upon this matter. Moo.










Moo moo moo moo, moo moo moo mooooo.

Fuck crutches

FOR REAL. I hate them. I used them for an entire school day. Which was a mistake. Because I have to go to different buildings & they're all a billion miles away. So, today, I said 'fuck you' to the crutches. I'm limping everywhere, going negative 10 miles per second. I'm applying the pressure to most of my heel, & stretching it when I'm sitting down. So I should be fine in a couple of days. Fuck sprains. My entire upper body is sore. It hurts to move. I have bruises under my arms. I went to Andrea's house to get a wheel chair, but she couldn't find it, so she gave me a walker. Which is embarrassing for me to use & make me look like a grandma ):

At least I'm not this little mousy<3