Saturday

So, it didn't go as I had planned. But it was fun (: I was trying to get to the show, but I guess Jacob decided to stay home & eat dinner with his family, or something like that, hahah. But anyway, let me start from the beginning. So, I went with Madre to Hickory, early, like at 11 am. & we took Molly to Petsmart to get groomed. Did that, & in the same plaza, there's a music center, where I bought my capo :D Anyway, we went to the mall where she did Christmas shopping or something. & she bought me moccasins! MMMMM, SO WARMSZSZZZ! Hahaha. & so, I walked around the mall forever, by myself. & I think every cute boy in the WORLD decided to be there, at the exact same time. Good thing it was one of those days where you think you look good, & I was super comfy. Anyway. We went to go pick up Molly from PetSmart. I almost drooled, over the cutest boy I have EVER laid eyes on. NOT even kidding. & he smiled at me. & I think time stopped. Hahahaha. I think I melted. That's when Britni called me back. & I was petting all of the cute puppies. & he was around there, & he really did look a bit familiar. & I was going to talk to him, but before I did, Mom yelled for me to leave. I was like "NOOOOOOO" D: Well, at least I know he works there Saturdays ;D bahaha. Anyway. Mommypoo went to get her hair did, & so she gave me the car to go back home to drop off Molly, pick up Britni, & get some groceries. You know me & my legal driving! Hahaha. Then, we were off to Hickory again. No call from Jacob, so we just hung out downtown. We hung out in Tees for a bit & drank some coffee. & might I add, the coffee making boy was cute. & took a picture of me & his spoon. (I was kind of complaining, but in a jokingly way, about how my caramel macciato tasted, so he gave me a spoon to stir, because I hate stirrers.) & he was pretty cute, & blah, blah, blah. Then, we went & saw "Step Brothers". IT WAS HILARIOUS. & we were basically stranded there until midnight. We hung out in Drips, where we met some pretty alright kids. Which we hung out the rest of the night with. It was freezing, but at least my feet were warm! ;]



Currently:
I feel like total shit, because my best friend is going through the hardest times, & I can't be there for her physically, & it fucking kills me. I love you, Lauren. I hope everything works out. & I would give anything just to be there, but you know /:

Success!

I perfected how to play "Jesus In The Southern Sky". Also, I learned how to play "Not A Second To Waste", by Rocket To Then Moon! I also went through a bunch of old tabs that my old guitar teacher used to give me. I can remember how to read tabs now. Well, you know what I mean. Actually, whatever, I know what I mean. & that's all that matters.
Last night, my friend Nick tried to convince me that I wasn't real, & that his mind was the only one that exisited, & I was only part of his imagination. & I didn't think. He's gay. Haha :P
Oh, well, I don't think he reads my blogs, anyway. I don't think anyone does. Oh, well. I just want to get thoughts out of my head (:
Anyway, my entire body is sore from raking leaves. I raked for like, 7 years yesterday, haha. & I still haven't finished. Ugh. But! When I was raking, I realized that the view of the sky is best in my backyard. It was so pretty.
Yesterday, I finished reading "Of Mice & Men". I think I liked it, mostly. Except I just can't stand to read in a hick, gramatically incorrect, super Southern dialouge. It's so annoying. At least it wasn't as annoying as "The Adventures of Huckleberry Finn". Hated it. I'm now reading Andrea's Africa book "A Long Way Gone". It should be good. I finished reading the book with Memma in my made up British accent! We're on book two.

I really do like reading.

Saddest thing I have ever seen.

Yesterday, I went to Wendy's, & right by the drive-thru window, was a dog. It was a bitch. It looked as if it just had puppies, because it had like, big boobies or whatever. & you could see some of her ribs. & I threw one of my french fries, so she could eat it, & she was like, scared to go near it, but then she ate it & I gave her almost all of my fries. It was the saddest thing, ever. I felt so bad. I wanted to take her home, but I wonder if she has her puppies around somewhere in the bushes or SOMETHING. So, I'm making my mom call animal control today to go rescue her, & nourish her back to health. & find her puppies. She's really shy. I felt like crying. Saddest thing of my life. Then I started thinking about homeless people. & I felt even worse.

I wish I had all the money & food in the world to help everyone in need.

)':

This weekend.

I think I've been blogging about my weekend, like, every Monday, haha. Oh, well. It's because there are new adventures! Anyway. This weekend was pretty good. Friday, Emma came over, & I wrote hate mail to Highlights magazines. My little brother had a magazine, & we decided to fool around with it, only to find that they had an impossible puzzle that neither one of us could figure out. So, I e-mailed them. It was hilarious. That night, Andrea & Thea also came over. All we could do was scream & laugh. I don't think I could sum up how much we literally rofl'd & screamed at the top of out lungs. & even if I did, you would not believe me for the world. Haha. Emma slept over, & I could not stop talking about Mr. Robbins. I have an obsession, hahaha. The next day, Britni came over. So, we went to the pretty lake in my neighborhood. It was perfect. It wasn't too cold or hot. I brought music & we were out there paddling all the way to the end of the lake. Talking the day away, or so I would've hoped. But then, I guess the owner of all of that land told us to get out ): It ruined my life. Actually, Cody ruined my life. He, along with 3 other guys stood there, yelling at us to come back to shore. I almost died, because it took us at least 20 minutes to paddle all the way out there. & there was this one realllllly cute guy. & they all stood there, & WATCHED me & Britni paddle, like idiots, on a dock. I think I almost peed my pants of embarrassment. I hate them. I'm not talking to them for a while. Then, the owner told us we couldn't be down there unless we were with Cody or John. & I find it extremely irritating to be around them all of the time. So, goodbye, beautiful lake ): Anyway. Later on, we went to the movies. I hadn't been to the movies in foreverrrrr. We saw Bolt in 3D! It was so good. Britni doesn't like animated movies, but she's glad I convinced her into coming to see this one. Oh, Rhino<3 haha. Then we got Taco Bell. We ate it in Barnes & Nobles, after reading raging lesbian books in the children's section. & my caramel macciato was perfect. She slept over. At 3 am that morning, I thought Britni was the devil. Because in that one movie "The Exorcism of Emily Rose" they said that the devil's hour is 3 am or something like that. So I freaked out & couldn't look at her for like, half an hour, hahahah. We beatboxed all night! Kellin Quinn is my HUSBAND. We had the beat down by 4:30, which is when we passed out. But by the morning, we had fogotten how to do it. I almost cried. Haha. Then I spent all Sunday with my guitar. I hadn't played in years. I quit, because I sucked & I was just really lazy. But I had been obsessing over this new song, "Jesus in the Soutehrn Sky". I'm in love with the video 'For All We Know' made. I also made Matt fall in love with it. Haha. Anyway. I found a video in which this girl teaches you how to play it step by step. Which is what I always need, because I'm so bad with chord names. So, I have almost all of the chords down, then I can play itttt. I might also mention how bad it made the tips of my fingers hurt & burn ): & It like, broke my wrist, haha. But I'm glad I'm picking up my guitar again. Because as annoying & painful as I thought it was, I miss it. I miss learning my favorite songs, or having something to do when I'm bored.


Blah, blah, blahhh. I'm in class at the moment, & I wish I could destory this computer. Making a web site is a lot more frustrating than I thought /:

I just, don't know

why I wanted to blog so bad right now. I really don't have much to say. I guess I'll tell you about my neighborhood. I thought it was dumb & full of old people. But, no. It's actually really pretty. It's got a cute lake, surrounded by a 150 foot cliff or something like that, & the pretty trees. & there's so many spots you can see it. It's so scenic. My God, it's absolutely gorgeous. There's also a little river-stream type thing, at the end of my street, at the culdesac, that runs basically throughout my whole neighborhood, at the very back, though. Anyway. There's cute little trails to follow. There's so many good spots to pick & just chill out. It could be a thinking spot. A spot you go to just calm down. A spot you go to be peaceful, with yourself, friends, the world, anything. A spot to read a good book. I'm so excited to do all of these things in the summer. I think it'd be great. & I'm thankful for Cody, neighborhood buddy, for showing me all of these cool places. The lake is really pretty at night. I went there with Cody the other night, & I just laid on the dock & stared at the stars. It was so pretty; with the moon reflecting on the lake. Aaaah, I'd go down there by myself, but it's kind of a good 15 minute walk, & it's dark & creepy out ):

Whoever you are, reading this, just know I would spend any afternoon with you, & only you, watching the sun set on this beautiful dock. Without a doubt<3

Are you always dreaming?

Have you ever had those thoughts, where you think you're dreaming? Or, let me put it better this way. Today, in the shower, I was just thinking. What if my life, everything in it, all the events, my friends, anything that ever happened, was all in my head. Like, none of it ever existed, & I just thought it all up. I think about that a lot. Sometimes, I feel so light headed, that I think I'm a puppet or something. Then I thought that since everything was in my head, what if in reality, I was some insane person who couldn't even handle eating, or something? I'm weird. Hopefully, all of this isn't in my head, & I'm alive & fully functional.

Most awkward Saturday of my life.

Alright. So, all week, I had been waiting for Dylan Gilbert on Saturday. It was supposed to be me, Emma, Britni, Andrea, & Eric. It was a good Saturday. I had gone to Andrea's at noon & spent the whole day with her. We watched August Rush & it was the cutest movie. I cried, just a little bit. Then we had a photo op with Raleigh on the roof. After I watched Andrea cute his hair, hahah (:
Anyway. I played Rock Band for the first time, too. It was fun. So then. We got all ready & walked to Britni's at 6 or so. We were waiting on Eric, in which he said Chase was coming along. Rofl. So we waited, & waited. Me & Britni 'moshed' in her room to her DVDs. Then, Andrea called Eric a hundred times, when he finally picked up, & it was already like, 7:30, aka we were supposed to be in Downtown Hickory, & we were in Lenoir. Half an hour drive, & the show was starting. We died, when he said his car was like broke down with no gas or something like that. Plans fell through. We were trying to think of different guys to hang with, & there was no one. Then Britni was texting her friend, & he was with a couple of other friends, in which I had talked to both of them on MySpace, a looong time ago. So I was like 'let's walk down there & chill, since we have nothing else to do.' Which was the biggest mistake of my life. Hahahaha. They were with their girlfriends. & it was so awkward. No one talked to me, but all of two seconds the entire time. & that was because they liked my necklace, & one of the girls had it tattooed on her chest. Blah, blah, blahhhh. We went to McDonalds. Good ole' Mickey D's. Got food. Sat down. They were all cracking insiders, while me, Britni, & Andi sat at another table, next to them, of course, but like, no interaction. I could have had a heart attack, & no one would have noticed. Hahaha. So we decided to get up & leave, because our lives had been ruined enough. So, since no one really knew me there, I was like 'uh, we're just gonna leave, 'cause this is super awkward, so uhhhh...' Me, being a dumb ass, thinking everyone has common courtesy; I thought someone would be cool & nice enough to be like 'oh, stay & we'll not be awkward & talk to you & get to know you'. Some shit like that. But no. No one spoke. & we left. I almost peed my pants in embarrassment. I don't care, though. It's whatever. I was up for meeting new people, but I guess they weren't. Anyway. We walked around Downtown Lenoir, which I had never been to, so it was like a little tour. It was nice, but it was freeeeezing! Anyway, my Saturday was ruined, but I liked it when it was just the girls (: Oh. Minus Emma, because she was with her boyfriend -___- Haha :P


Anyway.
I conclude with this, that I may be the most awkward person in the world, but other people are GAY. Gay, I say! Gay, gay, gay. Hahaha. Just kidding. Well, kind of. Blahhhh, people should be nicer, & have that warm welcoming feeling. Including myself. Ah, whatever. I have to pee.

Hahaha, people are gaaaaaayzorrrrzz

People talk too much. Especially about politics. I was about to either cry, or punch everyone in the face this morning. For about the past three months, all you ever heard was 'Obama this, & McCain that.' Shut up. Just shut up. No one cares, Barack won. Well, I shouldn't say that. We should all care about our economy some what, & definitely our future. But it's people, that aren't even old enough to VOTE, are ranting on & on about shite they haven't the slightest idea what they're talking about. & that just makes me wanna pee all over them. Not gonna lie. Hahah. Aaaah. "I like my presidential candidate just like I like my chocolate." Andrea's hilarious. Anyway. People are like, CRYING that McCain lost. Idiots. & the whole office is democrat this year, haha, I lalalalooooove it. Kill me. I should have worn my Obama sticker today. On my FOREHEAD. Although I do have this snazzy photo of me & my bff Barack. No biggie ;]

WHAT IT ISSSSSSS, ERR'BODY!?

We're cute, we know this. We go waaaaay back. Barack loves me. Hahahahahaha. You love this picture, I just know it. Bye.

I hate Greensboro, North Carolina!

Mostly, I hate Christofer Drew & HelloGoodbye for having a show today, on a stupid Tuesday. ON ELECTION DAY. Idiots. & Friday, Bayside & Valencia. I really only care about Christofer Drew & Bayside, though. Both in Greensboro. I give Bayside a little more whatever though, because it's at least on a Friday. But it's still in Greensboro. Why not Charlotte!? A tiny bit closer. Still. I wish I lived closer. I can't wait to obtain my license & a car. THEN I CAN DRIVE TO GREENSBORO! Until then, it just ruins my life & makes me wanna cry D:


Anyway.
Vote Obama!
Bye<3

Paranoid.

About ghosts. Jacob & Andrea ruined my life last night. We were laying in a hammock outside, with a blanket. When it was my bright idea to tell scary stories, except that I had none. So then Jacob starts telling like, real-ass ghost experiences. & Andi did, too. I almost peed my pants. I hate shit like that. I'm such a nervous/paranoid person, especially when it comes to shit like this. They tried showing me videos with ghosts. I just can't bring myself to watch them. I just can't. So, when I got home, I just laid in bed & slept. I was too scared to do anything else. & I made my little brother sleep with me, for my parents were out partying. Raleigh said he would protect me, but I haven't seen him pacing my house with a flashlight anywhere D:< haha. Anyway. This weekend was nice. Friday, I handed out candy in pajamas, bare foot, in Eric's beanie, which I still haven't returned & his ears are cold /: Then Britni & Andrea came over & we went to a bonfire with a couple of guys from my neighborhood, who ride my bus. That's where my old assistant principal was hanging there & he SERVED ME FOOD. I was like 'I'm telling everyone at South'. hahahah. Then we rented Saw 1, 2, & 3, for I had never seen them. We wanted to watch them that night, when the DVD player downstairs decided not to play. So we ended up chatting the night away for 5 hours till about 4:30 am. It was nice. We fell asleep on the couch. That's when I awoke to my little brother watching TV at 10. I was about to punch him in the head, for waking us up. So then, since we didn't watch the movies last night, we watched them yesterday morn. I was so disappointed. I've heard the Saw movies were the greatest thing ever. I laughed at most of them. Although some parts did get me. Number 3 was my favorite. I have yet to see 4 &5. After that, we went to Thea's birthday/Halloween party around 8. & that's when the whole ghost thing happened. It was also the first time me & Jacob met/hung out. Well we had met a couple of other times, I suppose, but it's whatever. Today, I woke up at 8:30. Peed. & continued sleeping till about 2. My parents still weren't home from the night before. So I read a book Andrea had given me to read. I'm more than half way through it, & it's very confusing. It has like a thousand characters. I can't keep up with who is who, mainly because it doesn't tell you at all. It's so random. I hope to finish & understand it by tomorrow.


So, overall this weekend was good. I'm happy.
I'm actually not talking to any guys right now.
& it feels right.